A message to my teenage self

Hi Janie, aged 13,

Being 13 does not make you clever, or right. You think you know everything there is to know, but you really don’t. You do not know how to make your £10 phone credit last a month let alone how to actually pay bills, buy clothes and food with whatever you earn per month when you are older.

You need to be less selfish too. Your mum and dad do a lot for you. I know that every teenager goes through the “pain-in-the-arse” stage, but you should snap out of having a moan every single day. They DO understand you, they understand what it is like to grow up, (remember, they did too). They treat you to holidays, they help pay for you to do dancing shows and competitions, they buy you clothes, they spoil you at Xmas and on your birthdays. CUT THEM A BREAK. You spoilt cow.

You do not have to be happy all the time, you do not have to be nice to everyone. You go round and chat to everyone, be nice to everyone, but some people just do not deserve your niceness. Only be nice to people who 1. are nice people, and 2. are nice back. Don’t bother with the the nasty people, because even though you want to be nice to them so they don’t hate you, you don’t need to waste your time because in the future, you learn that not everyone deserves your attention. Not tooting my own horn, but you only need certain people in your life. I am not saying be horrible, but be civil, be polite, and concentrate on the friends who are nice to you and give you the time of day. They are, after all, the people who help build you to become the person you are today.

Same again when I say, stop trying to fit in. You fit into groups easier when you are yourself, because they will like you for you. You will change from your group of friends from school, and make a new group of friends in college, but try and stay in contact with your friends because they have helped make you grow up to the adult you are now.

You will meet some amazing people whilst you grow up, from friends, to family, to teachers. You will learn a lot whilst you are with them, and you will learn a lot about yourself. Treat them nicely, because the friends you end up with at this age are not worth the risk of losing. Whilst at university, keep in touch with your friends back home, and when you are back home, keep in touch with your friends at university. They are still the same people you bonded with from the first time you met them, and keep them because they will still play an important part in your life.

Please do not get manipulated into doing things. Some people will try and force you to do something you do not want to do. Don’t feel the pressure. You are naive and others thrive off that. You don’t like hurting people but sometimes, you will end up doing so, just because you felt pressured. You are not a nasty person, so please think for yourself a lot more, than trying to please someone who actually, is not worth your time.

You were really clever back in Primary school, so keep working hard throughout your school life. You will go to college, and then you will go to University. A shock I know, as no-one in your family has ever been to University. You are not the smartest person, but you are a creative person. Keep working on your writing as this will play a big part in years to come.

Start taking things more seriously. Throughout you life so far, you have had it pretty easy, and so you are very laid back. Start working hard please.

When it comes to boys, you will kiss many frogs before you meet your prince. You will start to have such a warped view on how a relationship is run. You will have a very horrible relationship which makes you scared and not trust anyone. But don’t worry, you will learn to trust again. Right now, you are in a relationship with a pretty awesome guy who normally isn’t your type. But his personality bounces off yours and your plans for the future reflect on your relationship on concentrating on living your life. It will be hard for a while, but if it works it will be worth it.

So, I hope you take everything I say. I am you at 21 and I have lived through the next 8 years of your life, and right now; I am happy. Things can obviously improve, but I am happy. Hopefully, you are too.

Janie, aged 21

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